Eat-Sleep-Love | Maryland DC & Virginia Sleep Coach, Baby Planner, Maternity & Child Consultant

Maternity & Parenting Center

Those were the days, my friends . . . .

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This weekend, we went to Elliot’s 20th college reunion at Penn. It is amazing how reunions everywhere are all the same. There is a lot of superficial chatting and catching up, a lot of checking out everyone to assess who got old, who got fat, who looks good, who is married, who is divorced, who has children, who has a good job, and the obligatory self-comparison . . . the “am I younger looking, do I have a better job, am I better off than . . . ” line of thought. It is also amazing how the same old cliques seem to resurface, and the same old insecurities can rise to the surface.

On a side note, Elliot is one of those guys that does not seem to have close friends. He has TONS of acquaintances, but no close circle of male friends with whom he regularly socializes. I bring this up to put him in context for his reunion. He went to this reunion not knowing who would be there, and without any plans to meet up with an inner circle of friends. As such, we were sort of “lone wolves” at the reunion. We did not have a select group of friends with whom we attended all the activities, and it was really hard to figure out the people I should try and talk to and befriend. Let’s be honest . . . no one at the reunion was there to learn about me! If Elliot had a group of close friends, they might want to get to know me because they would be interested in learning about Elliot’s life. But most of the people there learned I did not attend and just simply moved on instead of talking to me. (To be honest, I think some of the women looked at me and thought – “she looks much younger than the rest of us, and I just want to get away so she does not make me look too old”). I think reunions are more fun when you are the one who attended the school!

We did have a good time – Elliot got to see lots of faces from his past, revisit the campus where he spent a chunk of his life, and reconnect with his past. It was fun to see him in his element and hear some of his college stories. There was even a slightly embarassing clip of him in the class video from his college days that I have on DVD and intend to show to Micah one day down the road.

Even better for me . . . we stayed with my friend Tammy who is a thoracic surgeon at HUP. She had to work most of the weekend, but she was kind enough to offer us a place to sleep and to stay in on Friday night so we could leave Micah with her while we attended reunion activities. Elliot, Micah and I went to the class parade and picnic together on Saturday. When we returned, we headed out with Tammy for some delicious gelatto (I think the best gelatto I’ve had in the US to date!). Tammy, Micah and I stayed in on Saturday night while Elliot went to a party at a local bar. To be fair, Tammy and I had kind of exciting plans. We ordered Indian food, then rented Frost/Nixon. We thoroughly enjoyed our dinner, put Micah to sleep, and then 5 minutes into the movie . . . we were both passed out and asleep. That is right, ladies and gentleman, we didn’t even talk and catch up. Elliot got home around 11:30. I woke up and pumped . . . and went back to sleep around 1. It was a wild and crazy night.

***At Tammy’s request (see comments below), I am clarifying that she had to get up very early Saturday and Sunday (and well, frankly, everyday!). She had to be at work at 6. I had the Micah Man waking me up early, so between the two of us, we were just exhausted!

Playing the noses

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When my niece Paige was almost 1 year old, we went out to dinner to celebrate my birthday. While we were walking to the parking lot, Elliot was holding her, and she reached up and pinched his nose. As she did that, he said “honk.” She looked at him, smiled, and pinched his nose again. Once again, he said “honk.” She then looked at me, reached over, and pinched my nose. I promptly said “beep.” Next thing you know, she is reaching around and pinching each of our noses, and we are each making a different sound. She was laughing, smiling and “playing the noses.” She made lovely music that night, and every time we saw her after that for quite some time.

Micah has recently started to grab and pinch noses, and once again, Elliot says honk every time he pinches. He smiles, and does it over and over again, just like he pushes the buttons on his toys to see them light up and play music. Micah also loves to pinch my nose to hear it honk, and I will push his nose and say “beep, beep.” We are slowly teaching Micah to “play the noses” – just wait, he is going to be a star! Maybe we can take him on Jay Leno’s “Stupid Baby Tricks” to reveal his musical nose masterpiece.

5 months

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Micah is 5 months old today!! I cannot believe how fast my little man is growing up. In honor of this momentous occasion, I thought I would do a rundown of his “stats.”

Micah is approximately 14 lbs. and wearing size 3-6 months. He can briefly hold a sit. He has found his feet (loves to grab them and play with them) and his thumb (he loves to suck it). He smiles and laughs all the time. He gives wonderful hugs, and loves to cuddle. He rolls from tummy to back, but doesn’t fully roll from back to tummy. He can push buttons, and flip switches on toys, and he grabs and reaches and plays all the time. He loves to chat – he talks to his mobile every morning when he wakes up! We think he is teething . . . he has a white spot on his bottom gums, and he has been fussing and chewing and gnawing all the time. I think it will probably be a bit longer before an actual tooth cuts through. He can pick up and put in his own pacifier . . . although he is more efficient at taking it out. He has discovered the dog . . . he loves to pet her . . . or should I say grab chunks of fur. He is eating 2 tbs of rice cereal a day, and likes to help feed himself. His hair is LONG – it touches his back. He definitely recognizes me (and his Daddy), and he is starting to assert himself – he knows what he wants and he isn’t afraid to try and communicate it.

I love listening to Micah laugh and talk. His laugh is adorable . . . it kind of bubbles up. His face just lights up when he is happy. I love when he smiles and reaches for me, and the joy that goes across his face when I rub noses with him. I love the look on his face when he sees me after a day at daycare. I love that he is happy when he wakes up in the morning. I love napping with him cuddled close to me in the bed. I love watching him study things and figure out how to press buttons and make his toys work. I love watching him twist and move and turn.

The past five months have been amazing, and I am looking forward to watching my little man continue to grow by leaps and bounds over the months and years to come. Today we will go take his 5 month pictures – I’ll post them as soon as I can!

The things they don’t tell you

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I have posted before about the things they don’t tell you about parenthood, and I thought I would revisit the subject again today. I had a rough pregnancy, and when Micah was born, we had quite a few challenges getting him to eat. That was one of the “things they don’t tell you.”

Nevertheless, I’m so thankful Micah hung in there long enough to avoid NICU time, and I’m so grateful that I was able to bring him home with me when I left the hospital. I’ve had two friends recently give birth very early – one friend at 31 weeks, and another friend gave birth to twins at 33 weeks. Thankfully, the 31 weeker made it home after 3 1/2 weeks in the NICU, no complications. My other friend’s twins are doing well, but she recently learned that one of them has a heart condition. I think another one of the “things they don’t tell you” is how hard it is to go through those first few weeks when you have a baby in the NICU. I cannot speak from personal experience, but leaving your baby (or babies) at the hospital must be devastating. Watching them struggle to grow and learn to eat . . . well, that is something I understand. It is exhausting to work so hard to bring those little ones along. And there are scary and frustrating times, too. I think we all expect to give birth and have a baby that grows and eats and is just . . . well, a baby. While you never can appreciate the demands of even a “just a baby” until you have one, I don’t think anyone really can communicate how difficult things are when you are dealing with a preemie. They need to grow strong enough so eating isn’t exhausting, and they have to learn to suck, and they have to figure out how to suck and eat and breath all together, and have enough energy to do that 8-10 times per day! I guess I just wanted to congratulate those moms of preemies out there . . . the challenges you face are more than anyone ever expects from a a baby.

I have another friend who has been having a rough week with her 3 month old son. He has been waking up 4 or 5 times a night, and she is exhausted and melting down. That is another one of those things they don’t tell you – those days are terrible. I remember the exhaustion from the early weeks, and the utter frustration I felt sometimes when I was functioning with no sleep and feedings were not going well, or Micah was fussy about something. We still occasionally have those nights (and sometimes 2 or 3 of those nights in a row) and they are the pits! In those moments, I kind of understood how some mothers come to hurt their children (and don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I ever wanted to hurt Micah, just that I suddenly could understand how someone might get to that point). My advice to new mothers is this: it is so important to allow yourself that frustration and find an outlet, and figure out how to walk away and take the time you need to recover. For me, there were nights I just turned to Elliot, woke him up, and said “I just can’t do this anymore tonight. I don’t care if you are tired, I don’t care if you need to give him a bottle of formula, and I don’t care if you have to stay up all night rocking him, but you need to take him and I am going to sleep” and I would walk away and go to sleep. I think recognizing my limits and asking for help (or walking away) was critical to keeping my sanity. We mothers feel guilty when we get that tired and frustrated. We feel as if we should find every moment joyous and exciting, because we are just so happy to be parents and we are so full of love for our children. I think I have learned that being frustrated and at wits end is nothing to feel guilty about – it is just one of those “things they don’t tell you.”

EIGHT

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Mandy tagged me on her blog, so here goes . . .

8 things I’m looking forward to…
1. Watching Micah grow up.
2. Taking Micah swimming this summer.
3. Visiting my friend Tammy in Philly this coming weekend.
4. Going to the beach this summer.
5. Finally getting to Hawaii . . . hopefully this fall!
6. Baking Micah’s first birthday cake.
7. Summertime . . . pool and sun, here I come!
8. Seeing my nieces on Friday.

8 things I did yesterday…
1. Fed Micah at 7:15 am.
2. Took a 9:00 am business call.
3. Took a 10:00 am business call.
4. Went for my annual checkup.
5. Went and picked up a new outfit for my Mother’s Day picture with Micah.
6. Went to the BBYO office to help out with a presentation.
7. Pumped two times (at 2 and 4).
8. Wrote a proposal for a client.

8 things I wish I could do…
1. Take off for a vacation somewhere exotic.
2. Lose weight.
3. Get pregnant again easily when we are ready.
4. Get childcare for Micah.
5. Do a better job of balancing work and Micah.
6. Finish the home renovations and sell my house.
7. Win the lottery and do some good for the world with the money.
8. Hire someone to massage me 24 hours a day!

8 shows I am currently watching…
1. American Idol
2. SVU
3. House
4. One Tree Hill
5. Law & Order
6. Bones
7. Without a Trace
8. Big Bang Theory

Now I’m tagging 8 people: Tammy, Chele, Amy, Kari, Molli, Heather, Carmen, Susie.

When he is good, he is very, very good, but when he is bad he is horrid!

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My grandmother used to tell me that nursery rhyme all the time when I was a child. Unfortunately, on Saturday night, Micah made me remember that rhyme. In all fairness, he was not intentionally horrid, and I am partially to blame for his behavior. You see, I think he was missing me.

We had a Bat Mitzvah to attend – my cousin Jill’s daughter, Rachel. We took Micah to the service at the synagogue in the morning, but the nighttime party was not a place for babies who should be in bed asleep. So, I arranged with my friends Heather and Brad to babysit for the night. I had Heather come over one night to observe Micah’s bedtime routine, but, unfortunately, we did not actually get a chance for her to put him to bed before the “big” night.

They arrived promptly at 6:00 pm. We had a chance to hang out so they could interact with Micah before we left. He had moments of whining before we left, so I was a bit fearful of what was to come. Elliot & I left for the night, and off we went!

At 10:00, I realized I had gotten a text from Heather. Filled with trepidation, I slowly opened the message . . . and realized she was asking for the password to my computer! I was filled with relief as I *knew* all went well. Needless to say, I texted back the password and asked how it went. Unfortunately, the response was not as I expected. Apparently, about 5 minutes after we left, Micah went from cute and smiling to hysterics. Uncontrollable hysterics. The kind that had him crying, coughing, choking, and snot pouring out of his nose. He wouldn’t let them give him a bottle or his medicine – NOTHING would comfort him. The hysterics went on for nearly an hour. It was Brad who finally got Micah calm, and taking the bottle, and off to sleep. Poor guy . . .he missed his mommy and daddy. I felt awful for him, but even worse for my friends. I’m sure they’ll NEVER agree to put him to bed again!

Happy Mother’s Day

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For the past several years, Mother’s Day has been bittersweet . . . it was a wonderful celebration of my mother, but it was tinged with sadness as I wondered if I, too, would ever get to be a mother. It was fun to celebrate the day, but at the same time, I would often bite back tears of grief and loss, as I was a “Mommy-in-Waiting.”

Last year, we had just learned I was pregnant and had seen Micah’s heart beating for the first time on the ultrasound only days before. Mother’s Day was so emotional for me . . . I was so excited that I was a “Mommy-to-Be” on Mother’s Day, and that this year I would finally be a mommy on Mother’s Day. I also had moments of fear . . . I was only 7 weeks pregnant, and worried that something could still go wrong. But mostly, I was brimming with hope, and a sense that Mother’s Day was truly a holiday for ME.

This year, all I can say is that I am so grateful to be a mommy, and so happy that Micah came into our lives. I was greeted this morning with a beautiful smile from my son, and several wonderful gifts from my family. Elliot bought me a brand new bike so we can go on some family bike rides together, my sisters-in-law bought me a gift certificate for a massage, and we are headed over to my parents’ house for a wonderful day together. What more could I want today?

I wanted to wish a wonderful Mother’s Day to all the Mommies, Mommies-to-Be and Mommies-in-Waiting out there!

Repetition is a good thing

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I learned one important thing today . . . singing the same song over and over to your child has its benefits. Since the day Micah was born, there have been 2 songs that I sing to him when I soothe him – You are my Sunshine and The Rose. We sing other songs for fun, but those have been our soothing songs. I will sing them over and over when I am putting him down or comforting him when he cries. What I learned today is that he recognizes the songs. I barely had to begin singing You are my Sunshine on the plane today and he started to calm down. The flip side is he started screaming again every time I stopped, but I digress.

This morning, Micah woke up around 7, happy and chatting once again. I fed him and then got myself packed and ready for my meetings. Elliot joined us for one meeting (I brought him in as a consultant on an Emergency Preparedness project for this client), so Micah came to our meeting for a bit. He was a really good boy – he hung out in his stroller and played, smiled, and laughed. He also wanted to talk a bit in the meeting since his Daddy and I were speaking. Everyone kept telling us what a wonderful baby he is. Here are some photos of us at the meeting together:


We headed to the airport around 3:30. We made it to the gate in plenty of time. Once again, it was a packed flight, so Micah had to sit on my lap. We got on the plane, and he was a bit fussy. I nursed him, and he fell asleep just before takeoff. He slept for the first part of the flight, but we hit some turbulence, we changed altitude and Micah woke up crying. I think his ears were bothering him. I brought Micah close and began to sing to him, and he quickly calmed down. Within a few minutes, Micah was chatting and smiling again. I passed him to his Daddy, and they bounced, and played flying baby, and took a walk around the plane.

Towards the end of the flight, Micah got fussy again. I’m not sure if it was his ears, or if his reflux was the problem, or perhaps those possible teeth cutting through, but he was miserable most of the last half hour. I sang him to sleep and he cuddled close to me – as long as I was rocking and singing, he was quiet. Right when we landed, he started getting hysterical – exactly 12 hours after he took his last dose of Zantac. As soon as we got off the plane, I gave him his medicine and changed his diaper. We went to the parking garage, and I nursed him while we waited for Elliot to get the car. Elliot decided to capture the moment . . . this is me nursing Micah while I sat in a wheelchair in the parking garage:

As soon as we got in the car and started driving, Micah got upset again. I was leaning backwards, holding his hand, and keeping his paci in his mouth. About 10 minutes into the trip home, he fell asleep. We managed to get him in the house and into the crib without waking him up. He is still sound asleep right now!

Here are a few fun pictures of Micah – he is sitting in a real high chair for dinner at his Aunt Jen and Uncle Jeremy’s house, and playing in his new exersaucer loaned to us by his Aunt Jen and Uncle Jeremy. Can you believe what a big boy Micah is becoming?


My very noisy baby

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The Micah man (one of my nicknames for him) had a great day today with his Daddy (and I was just excited that I managed to pump as much as he was eating!). I think his Daddy was a bit exhausted by the end of the day, and perhaps came to a new appreciation of how hard it really is for me most days, and how impossible it is to get much work done. Apparently, from when I left around 9 am until lunchtime, Micah was mostly wide awake and playing and chatting.

My boys came and joined me for lunch, and Micah was a huge hit (as always). He was sweet and smiling and just . . . charming. His nose is still pretty leaky, and he has been sneezing, but I still do not think he is sick – no fever, everything is still running clear. It is probably allergies (even though the doctors tell you that babies do not get environmental allergies until they are two). May I digress for a second? That theory is a lot of crap to me. If babies can develop allergies to food under 1 year of age, they can certainly develop allergies to the environment. I understand the doctors do not want to diagnose or treat it that young, but let’s be honest here. His sneezing and coughing worsens when my allergies worsen – clearly there is a connection. The vet gave me the same story when Nugget was a puppy – she sneezed and coughed and itched, and I said it was allergies. She did it seasonally for 2 years, and after her 2nd birthday, they suddenly said “now she has allergies.” Let’s just hope the stuffiness doesn’t give Micah an ear infection this plane trip. He was a little unhappy with the pressure the last flight.

Okay – stepping off my soapbox, and returning to the regularly scheduled topic . . . Micah! After lunch, Micah and Daddy went on a few walks, and played with toys, and overall had a wonderful day together. After I returned from my conference, we decided to head out to dinner. We went to a little restaurant that I remembered from my days at Emory called La Fonda. We had a wonderful meal (I ordered vegetable paella) and we drank some sangria. At the end of the meal, Micah was getting tired and hungry. I nursed him and hoped he would fall asleep in his carseat so we could go visit another old “haunt” from my college years . . . Cafe Intermezzo. For those of you who have never been, it is a chichi coffee place in Buckhead. The outside heated patio was built around existing trees. They play French and Italian language lessons in the bathroom. They take you on a “tour” of the desserts. It is the kind of place that you can show up to in a fancy evening gown or in your sweats while studying for exams, and both outfits somehow “fit.”

We started the drive over to Buckhead, and Micah started to get really upset. We decided to pull into the Cafe Intermezzo parking lot, and I tried nursing Micah again while Elliot ran inside and checked out the place and picked up a slice of cake for us. Micah was really fussing, and refused to eat. I then thought he was getting hot, so I walked him around out in the fresh air, and he seemed to calm back down. When Elliot returned (with chocolate peanut butter cake!), we strapped Micah back in his carseat, and went to drive around Buckhead so I could reminisce about my college years. At this point, we were out past Micah’s normal bed time, but we expected that he would fall asleep while we drove. A few blocks into the drive . . . Micah began to fuss and cry. We turned around immediately and headed back towards the hotel. It took me another few minutes to realize why Micah was so upset – I was a bad Mommy and I forgot to give him his Zantac (we were only 20 minutes late with his dosage)! Luckily, we had some Mylanta in the car, so I gave him a bit to tide him over until we got back to the room. Not surprisingly, that did the trick, and my happy baby returned.

We brought him up to the room, got him into his pajamas, gave him his Zantac, and I tried nursing him again. He nursed to sleep, and I transferred him into the crib . . . and he woke up. I nursed him some more and sang to him – and he sat there smiling and chatting. I moved him back into the crib, and he spent the next 35 minutes playing with his feet, rolling around, and chatting very loudly. I can’t believe how much how much my little guy likes to talk! I have no idea what he was talking to, but boy did he have a lot to say! He giggled, and squawked, and made gutteral noises. I wish I knew what language he spoke. I think maybe Wookie . . . he has these gutteral growling sounds he makes that remind me of Chewbacca. Elliot insists that the language does not sound like anything from Star Trek. I’m a little worried that he can be that definitive about Star Trek languages. (Elliot is sitting here insisting that he is only certain it wasn’t Klingon, he cannot vouch for other languages). After a while, Micah just suddenly got quiet and fell asleep. My very noisy baby finally passed out around 10:00 pm.

One last note . . . Micah is officially a serious thumbsucker. I am not exactly sure how this happened – he was very happily a paci baby until a few weeks ago. He found his thumb one day, and it has been true love ever since. The nice thing is he does not need us to come in and reinsert the paci when it falls out, but the bad news is he sticks his thumb in his mouth while he is asleep – I hope he outgrows it, because that is going to be a nasty habit to break.

We fly back home tomorrow – wish us a good flight back, and let’s hope this flight is not as miserable for Micah as the trip out. We are landing around 7 pm, and we are hoping to remember to give him his Zantac, nurse him, and put him to bed in his carseat. With any luck, we’ll get him home and in bed without interrupting his sleep.

Oh, and we think Micah might actually be getting ready to cut teeth! It looks like there is a white raised patch on his lower gums – we think the 2 front teeth are not too far off!